There has been lots in the news lately about Twitter. Maybe you have noticed … and like me … are a wee bit curious what the fuss and muss is all about. Basically, in a peanut shell, it’s a micro-blogging social networking kind of thing. The real-time messages you send via cell phone, crackberry or computer have to be 140 characters or less. And each of these little messages lets people know what you are doing at any given moment. Just one constitutes a “tweet.” Personally, I have not a clue how to use such an animal. Cute little Tweetie Bird, and her arch enemy with a lisp, Sylvester, I totally understand. Tweeting and twittering I do not. The strange thing about twittering is … people have friends … but they also have followers. For some strange reason, followers are much more numerous and seem to be way more important than friends in the world of Twitter. Someone please explain this to me! Yep, and I heard that Facebook and MySpace better take notice because the two social networking sites just might get knocked off the top of the hill by all the Twitterholics out there. According to my just-completed research, the world seems to be all atwitter. You may have heard last week that CNN and Ashton Kutcher were duking it out with boxing gloves for the tip-top spot in the world of twittering. I heard Ashton won becoming the very first to reach one million “followers.” And now watch out … Oprah has boarded the school bus. My daughter explained it to me this way … “It’s a noun and a verb,” said Katie. That is probably way more than I wanted to know. Heck, I’m still trying to figure out computer abbreviations from last century like “LOL.” For the longest time, like since last week, I thought it meant “lots of luck,” instead of “laughing out loud.” My absolute favorite abbreviation is ROFL. I do that one a lot. It means … rolling on the floor laughing. Did I mention that Twitter peeps have their own shorthand language? Three guesses what TWTBL means. You guessed it … or maybe not … “tweet back later.” I’d have to say that was twitterific. “People say that twittering allows you to be on the cutting edge,” Katie explained, as she continued with a Twitter story. “My friend Jonathon follows a Houston Chronicle food blogger on Twitter. One evening a few weeks back a group of us were out when Jonathon received a Twitter message. It read, ‘a little birdie told me that Anvil is open.’” Anvil is a new bar in Houston that wasn’t supposed to be open yet, but it was. Heck, it still had paper covering the windows. Basically, only the food blogger’s Twitter followers knew and descended on the place. A “tweetup,” that would be an in-person meet-up of Twitter members was suggested … and a good time was had by all. After hearing about all the tweet-this and Twitter-that, I ventured cautiously onto the Web and found there is lots to this tweet stuff. Twitterers have a whole language. Did you know that “tweeterboxes” are twitterers who tweet too much? Hopefully, tweeterboxes turn off the tweeting when they are driving. And according to the Twitter Dictionary, “tweeple” are Twitter people. Geez, it wasn’t too long ago that I learned “peeps” was short for “people.” I hate it when someone comes up with another new word for me to learn. Oh, and did you know that a “twi-five” is a high-five via Twitter. That term was totally predictable … and kinda sad really. I much prefer the real live kind where two human palms joyously meet in person. We do lots of high-fives at the Frantz house. Usually on Tuesday afternoon when our special child, Mimi, gets home from the day center. That is the day of the week she goes bowling with her yellow group. It is one of the highlights of Mimi’s week to hang at the bowling alley and push that ball down a ramp and knock over some pins. Mimi likes to follow her high-fives with a resounding “woo-hoo.” Seriously, does life get any better than that? I’ve pretty much come to the conclusion that this whole Twitter thing is not for me. The only time anyone at the Frantz house will be getting twitterpated is the next time “Bambi” gets popped into the DVD player. Dixie Frantz is a long-time Kingwood resident and newspaper columnist since 1996. E-mail Dixie with your comments at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it..

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